The Art of the Pregame: A guide on What booze to use for my fellow hooligan’s

Bet you never thought of this, welp, that’s what I’m here for. All the stupid stuff to remember while you are thinking about the important stuff. The pregame booze may be overlooked and without proper thought could lead to some unfortunate, all be it hilarious consequences.

First… NO BOOZE BEFORE THE CEREMONY!!! I know what your thinking here…. but stop. Trust me on this one. Its not a matter of not being able to handle a shot before the I Do’s, its about standing up at the altar with a slow drip of whiskey creeping down your throat…. trust me its not fun. Total hypothetical situation here but lets call our Groom “Tommy” and lets say Tommy Learned the hard way before his own wedding by doing a shot or 3 of Tully before I walked… I mean before “Tommy” walked down the aisle and lets just say it was not fun. Whole time I was up there starring into my beautiful wife’s eyes about to commit the rest of our lives to each other and all I’m thinking is I would fight someone for a glass of water right now… don’t be that guy.

All Right. Ceremony is out of the way and time to crack open the first round. What are we drinking? Here are some tips form a 20+ year DJ and connoisseur of bad decisions in my 20’s !!!!!

Lay off anything to heavy early meaning beer or anything similar. Beer is a fantastic beverage of the God’s but its super filling. If you have been slamming Bud Heavy’s all morning and afternoon, come dinner time there is a good chance you aren’t gonna be that hungry. Not a bad thing but something to consider especially if dinner is filet and lobster tail. don’t want that to go to waste!!! Another thing to avoid is anything with too much sugar. For instance sangria is absolutely delicious but the sugar content over time will leave you with the most biblical hangover you could ever imagine!!

Seltzer or High Noon’s are a good option if you are a traditional beer drinker. they are considerably lighter and won’t cause you to fill up as much, a key to party longevity. The massively huge downside to these delicious drinks is you crack on open and next think you know you crushed a case of Claws and your looking for more… Always, I repeat Always use caution when dealing with any of these drinks. Years ago I had a wedding down town about a month after White Claws had gained popularity. The brides maid, who soaking wet weighed 120lbs had put down about 12 claws before her speech. Its only took about 45 seconds for her to throw up on the Mic in front of 200 friends and family then proceed to ask for a saltine while covered in vomit with a dead straight face…. Ain’t no laws when drinking Claws people.

If up to me, keep it simple, clear booze with soda water and fruit is in my opinion the best way to get it done. This would include tequila and vodka as the main source. I exclude gin cause I am classless and know nothing of the Juniper seed outside of the fact people in the 20 apparently loved the stuff. These drinks are light, and also refreshing. They leave room for all the food you may need and when talking to Grandma you won’t have whiskey breath hahaha. After dinner is done the gloves are off and have at it!!!! No matter the booze choice the goal is to drink responsibly. I went to college with a guy who got so plastered he had to be carried out of his own wedding about 2 hrs in….. Don’t be that guy!!!

Health and Happiness!!!