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The Vows!!!!!

Should you write your own? should you just repeat what the Officiant is saying? lemme tell ya about both and some other great possibility’s you might not know about.

First is to just repeat what the Officiant is saying, its basic, its to the point, and brevity is basically king here. If you are a person of few words, then this is the option for you. Another possibility may be you and your partner had a small destination wedding and want to have a quick ceremony at your local reception just to include those who couldn’t make the trip, in this instance repeating is the way to go. Perhaps you have a relative or friend Officiating the wedding this is an excellent opportunity to let them speak for you!!! Having a friend or family member Officiate the wedding is a great and fun way to include those that matter most. Some of the best ceremonies I’ve ever seen, a brother, sister or friend has been at the helm with hysterical anecdotes at the ready. Short and sweet if you go with the repeat!!!

Writing your own is what I see 70 times out of 100, it has some advantages, it has some down sides too. First, lets make sure these are written in advance. I’ve legit done 1000s of weddings and the amount of times I have contributed to the vows is shocking, but not a bad thing necessarily. Some, more stoic individuals may not be as comfortable airing out feelings in a public forum and this fear alone prevents the translation of emotion to pen and paper. No problem at all. If this is the case for you hold on, I’ve got ya covered shortly. For the rest the key to this is simple but not universal. Just talk to your partner. The Vows are when you block the rest of the world out, look into the eyes of the person across from you and tell them how you got to this point, why you love them, and plans for the future. Prior to my wedding, the only other way I could explain this was to compare it to Golf, right before you hit the big dog off the tee. For the Golfers out there you need no explanation but lemme break it down like a fraction for ya for those who don’t. The world goes calm, look at whats in front of you, cause that’s all that matters, take a deep breath and let er rip!!!! If you are one of the more quiet individuals I’ve got some ideas for you too!!!

If you want to write something special for your partner but don’t feel like saying it in front of a crowd of 200 then this part is for you!! The most common method I see for this is to write your vows separately, on your own time and during the ceremony put those vows in a box to be read on your one year anniversary. The cool part of this is every year as you read what was written the year past you can add a letter every year making it a life long commitment, just like the one you’re making to your partner. I’ve seen people do neat remixes to this too where they add a bottle of wine every year to enjoy while reading the letter, the possibility’s are endless with this one.

No matter which route you chose remember that the only truly important part is that you end with “I Do.” My personal favorite anecdote to this is after 15 months of elaborate planning, one of the most beautiful floral arrangements I’ve ever seen, a planned 30 min ceremony was unintentionally shorted to under 30 seconds. The instant the Bride and Groom hit the altar the friend officiating the wedding was so nervous he blacked out for a split second and when he came too he assumed it was the end of the wedding. A short 5 seconds after the bride arrived to great her partner he said the I do’s and concluded with “Welp, I now pronounce you Partners for life” and sent em on there way….. 30 second ceremony….the reception was a banger… all that matters it getting to the “I Do’s.”